I don’t want to lose myself. I don’t want to lose anything about me, just because of all the mockery. I love the way my neck grows as far up from my shoulders as it possibly can grow, and I adore the way my lips form succulent pillows. Sure, everything about me is long enough and big enough, smooth enough and even wrinkled enough.
The mole on the side of my left eye reminds me of my ancestry that can go back for many, many moons. As a matter of fact, if it ever went away, it would be way too soon because if every picture burned up in flames and every moment became lost in my memory, my children would still be able to find me based off of those intricate and minute things that make me seem so laughable, like I’m such an anomaly. Like I’m so funny…to look at.
So no, I don’t want any conditioning.
My hair curls around my shoulders like it’s tickled pink. It won’t relax for anything, and I, honestly, really don’t want it to stand down or lay down to a system of laws that would only assume it can force it to become something that it’s not. At the root of the whole journey, when the water flows through it…or when it flows through the water… it’s still coming back. It never went anywhere, defying each and every single odd that would dare shut it down. I earned my crown.
Conditioning…no…it’s not my thing. Why would I embrace something so blinding, as if I need to counteract the facts that make me attract all the attention, be it bad or good. Hell, you need to see me and enjoy all this versatility, just like I need to see everything about your make that’s not made up.
It’s only a matter of time before we all disappear, and if we’re not careful, no one will ever know that we were truly here.
Brand new book of poetry coming in 2017, featuring my poems “Conditioning” and “The Suffocation”
The first look at the book cover will be in my upcoming magazine, so subscribe to get the firsts for everything!
Until then, read all of my books right here at mirikacornelius.com.